hyperdemona:

prohumanagenda:

pennypaperbrain:

Much as I adore hippos, this is undeniably just. (via @persian-slipper)

Relatable

Consider the following

(via chongoblog)

beardedmrbean:

beardedmrbean:

(via daxdraggon)

hookhound:

i love video games

ralfmaximus:

bakuen:

knightofleo:

Implicit storytelling in two tweets:

Yeah. They did that. I bet the ‘clarification’ came as a result of some strong legal threats.

So be aware in the coming weeks that if your favorite actor reportedly says something shitty about the strike that makes your blood boil? Check the sources. There’s going to be a lot of uh, spin in the news.

(via waxydoll)

teathattast:

(via euphoriaface)

jcrewguy:

ALT

(via ocheeva)

turningvioletviolet:

inoppositionflorien:

inoppositionflorien:

Your wish is my command, random advertisement. I don’t know what you expect me to do with your devilish concoction, but your wish remains my command.

I need to know what demographic hates this! Dentists? Dermatologists? General Doctors? Counter-Terrorist Organizations? Interpol? The USPS? Grocery Store Employees? The lucrative 18-35 demographic? Will I be put on trial for war crimes? But you don’t tell me, you just tell me to mix one with the other and fail to tell me who hates this one weird trick!

Well joke’s on you I’m going to do it without looking at your probably actively malicious website, and find out what you’re not telling me! If it turns into an explosive, it’s entirely on you, random advertisement.

Update: Don’t try this at home or anywhere. This creates one of the worst things I’ve ever personally made.

It started off fine as I mixed them. It changed to the color of the toothpaste (white), and vaguely resembled lotion in appearance. Then I made a horrible error. I touched it.

I touched it and immediately nearly all of it adhered to my skin. Everything I touched thereafter gained a thin layer of vaguely minty-smelling slime. It was some unholy abomination of a substance. Water couldn’t get it off. Soap couldn’t get it off. It stuck to tile, it stuck to wood, it stuck to carpet, and it doesn’t adhere to itself, so no amount of scraping with my hands could get it off, it just spread more.

Finally I had to get a sacrificial towel to wipe the substance off of me and everything I’d touched on the way to get the towel. Despite washing and scraping with a brush, my hands still smell like mint and feel slightly slimy. I can feel my skin burning from the mint flavoring of the toothpaste nearly an hour after getting it off my skin. I didn’t even know that was possible until today. I could have gone my whole life without knowing that, but now I know.

I have no idea what the ad actually wants you to do with this concoction as I did not click through, but I can only assume it wants you to use it to torture prisoners or something, there seems to be no other possible purpose for it.

(via waxydoll)

nettosan:

backsack:

cipheramnesia:

allergydyke:

in the TikTok robot lady voice

Yeah sure I’ll reblog that

(via manygregs)

seahdalune:

trans-madeline:

fuck papa louie and his stupid fucking burgeria. ive been THE ONLY COOK IN THIS ENTIRE GODDAMN BUILDING for 3 WEEKS. and JUST NOW, AT RANK 14, they call me “sandwich builder”. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??? I AM THE ONLY GODDAMN PERSON ON THIS SINKING SHIP OF A FAST FOOD PLACE. COOK YOUR OWN FUCKING BURGERS PAPA EAT MY ASSHOLE

(via meganiumgender)

evilwizard:

slonkel:

evilwizard:

business majors are like orcs to me. and not the hot kind

dnik toh eht ton dna .em ot scro ekil era srojam ssenisub

the backwards version for anyone who needs it

how many of my followers do you think are from the mirror dimension

(via shiny-kyogre)